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Exchange Men’s Retreat – Session 4: Closing the Gaps – Walking in Wholeness and Integrity

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Sermon by – Pastor Shawn Haggerty– Vox Church

My Personal Event Notes …

Theme: God is more committed to closing the gaps in your life than you are. He calls men to the front lines—not for status, but to stoop low in Christlike humility and integrity so others may flourish.


🛡 Called to the Front Lines

God doesn’t call men into a hierarchy of power. He calls us to model Christ, and where men lead in servant-hearted strength, the Church thrives.

We are called to stoop low, not to exalt ourselves, but to make others great in Him.

When men gather—especially in large groups seeking a fresh word from God—we are reminded of our design, purpose, and identity:

  • I am chosen.
  • I have purpose.
  • I belong.

Yet something happens in those moments… tension arises.
We become aware of the gaps—the space between who God designed us to be and how we’re actually living.

We are men of inconsistency. Something’s been compromised.


🕳 Living in the Gaps

We might say we love the Church, but if someone saw inside us, would they see the same?
We say we love God—but also love what our salary buys, the comfort, the distraction, the compromise.

Gabriel García Márquez once described that we live three lives—public, private, and secret.

The greater the inconsistency and the longer it’s held, the harder it becomes to hold it all together.

But by God’s mercy, when men meet, something happens:
We become more aware of those gaps, and we’re challenged to walk in integrity—in wholeness.

The whole of our lives was never meant to be filled with holes.


🔒 Integrity Brings Security

Proverbs 10:9 (ESV)

“Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.”

We must not leave this retreat weighed down only by guilt over inconsistency.
Because God is more committed to closing those gaps than we are.


🩸 The Cross Closes the Gaps

Hebrews 10:14 (ESV)

“For by a single offering he has perfected for all time those who are being sanctified.”

The cross is our proof.
It declares forever that we are perfect in God’s sight because Christ was perfect.
He is committed to our sanctification—our transformation.

Romans 8:29 (ESV)

“For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son…”

Galatians 4:19 (ESV)

“My little children, for whom I am again in the anguish of childbirth until Christ is formed in you!”

God is forming Christ in us especially when we feel the least like Him.
Do you believe that?
Are you submitting to that?


Confront the Gaps: Honesty and Submission

Psalm 24:1–6 (ESV)

“The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof,
the world and those who dwell therein,
for he has founded it upon the seas
and established it upon the rivers.
Who shall ascend the hill of the Lord?
And who shall stand in his holy place?
He who has clean hands and a pure heart,
who does not lift up his soul to what is false
and does not swear deceitfully.
He will receive blessing from the Lord
and righteousness from the God of his salvation.”

Jesus said in Matthew 5:8

“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.”

A pure heart flows into clean hands—actions shaped by single-hearted devotion to God.


💔 A Divided Heart Can’t Serve Two Masters

Matthew 6:24 (ESV)

“No one can serve two masters… You cannot serve God and money.”

When we compartmentalize God—giving Him one part of our life but withholding others—we elevate something else above Him.
That’s the definition of idolatry.
It’s the root of inconsistency.

James 4:8 (ESV)

“Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.
Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”


💭 What Makes Men Feel Unclean?

Levi Lusko said:
“Addiction is a worship disorder.”

Tyler Staton said:
“Satan doesn’t invent desire—he manipulates it.”

Lust is more than sexual—it’s taking a good gift, separating it from the Giver, and pursuing it our way.

These are mirror moments of insanity where we say, “I am my own master.”

But Jesus is not willing to share our hearts.
We must choose: one master or none.


🌍 Don’t Buy What the World is Selling

1 John 2:15–17 (ESV)

“Do not love the world or the things in the world.
If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world.
And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”

We need to ask God:

“Where do I love something in this world more than I love You?”
He loves to answer that prayer.


🧍 What Would People Say You Worship?

Psalm 115:4–8 (ESV)

“Their idols are silver and gold, the work of human hands.
They have mouths, but do not speak; eyes, but do not see.
They have ears, but do not hear; noses, but do not smell.
They have hands, but do not feel; feet, but do not walk;
and they do not make a sound in their throat.
Those who make them become like them;
so do all who trust in them.”

If someone watched your life for a week—how you spend your time, money, and attention—what would they say you worship?
What god would they say you swear by?

Idols don’t just occupy our time—they occupy our hearts. And God won’t share our hearts.


🩸 The Only Way to Be Clean

Hebrews 9:12 (ESV)

“[Jesus] entered once for all into the holy places, not by means of the blood of goats and calves but by means of his own blood, thus securing an eternal redemption.”

1 John 1:7 (ESV)

“But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.”

You can’t close the gap on your own. But you can stop what causes it, and never stop washing in the blood of Christ.


🧼 The Power of the Blood Applied

Like Ignaz Semmelweis, the 19th-century doctor who introduced hand-washing to save mothers in childbirth—we need to wash daily in the only solution that cleanses spiritual death:

The blood of Jesus.

We come back to God in repentance, not out of guilt—but out of genuine love.

Some of us have lost the rhythm of repentance. We’ve become numb. We feel like we can’t keep coming back.
But God says:

“Never stop drawing near. I will never stop washing you.”


💬 Final Quotes

Brennan Manning:
“God loves us as we are, not as we should be. Because none of us are as we should be.”

Jesus is enough. Grace is enough. And God is utterly committed to forming Christ in us.


🎯 Final Call

It’s not about perfection. It’s about faithful pursuit.
We must learn to love the current version of ourselves—not to accept sin, but to trust the God who is faithfully completing His work in us.

Jesus climbed the hill of the Lord.
He met every qualification.
And He gave His righteousness to us—so we could become the men we were always meant to be.

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